Responding to Offense
We all have had plenty of moments where we have been attacked, abused, wrongfully accused, manipulated, betrayed, and plenty more by other people. Being hurt by other people is not a new part of the human experience. In reality, as long as we are living in this broken world, with its broken people, we will get hurt by others. This is a guarantee. Especially for those who are in Christ, since we have the great call to love the world as Christ does. There is no escaping the risk that comes with loving. And in all honesty, the risk does not always pay off in the way we would like. However, this is the cup (Mark 10:38) that we chose to partake of when we said “yes” to following Christ. And then of course, the reward that we will receive from Christ for partaking of His cup and the fruit that is reaped from loving, is worth all the risk in ways that are beyond our comprehension.
An honest read of the New Testament would lead us to understand that suffering persecution is a promised part of the Christian life (John 15:18-20). But how do we respond in the face of persecution? First and foremost, we must be led by the Spirit of God. Each time we experience suffering because of others the Holy Spirit has a certain way He wants to lead us to respond. For example, we see a wide variety of responses from Jesus to the sin of others, He let people kill Him, He let people hit Him, He flipped tables, called people’s sin out, rebuked the religious, and often met sinners right where they were with grace and tenderness. So, what’s the formula? The formula is knowing God deeply, and knowing Him in the midst of persecution and letting your knowing of Him lead you to respond as He would. Jesus responded perfectly in all these circumstances because He was connected to the Father in intimacy and only did what He saw the Father doing (John 5:19).
Now, what do we do when it’s our own brothers and sisters in Christ that sin against us? Again, we must first be led by the Spirit of God. However, I’ve also listed several practical ways that God has taught, and is still teaching me, to respond to the offense of our family in Christ below.
1. First, stay true to the course. Do not let the offense and sin of our family in Christ take your eyes off of Jesus and all that He has already shown you and taught you.
2. Two, always be quick to forgive. Remember that forgiving and trusting are different things. You can forgive someone and still require that broken trust to be earned back.
3. Three, if appropriate and possible, seek to call your brother or sister up into who they are in Christ, instead of condemning them for their sin. We must learn to boldly and honestly confront others while also letting our confrontation have the end goal of calling them into who God has designed them to be.
4. Fourth, be merciless to the enemy. Even when it is in our own brothers and sisters in Christ. We need to remember that we aren’t perfect either. We are all subject to being demonized or functioning alongside demonic power in our brokenness. Therefore, we must love the person that hurt us; but also learn to be merciless to the enemy that is trying to harass and destroy them and those around them. Make war on the enemy for their sake or for the sake of the call of God. When you do this, remember it is not against flesh and blood that you battle (Ephesians 6:12). Do not treat your family in Christ the way you would treat a demon that may have hurt you or others through them.
In closing, we need to ask the Father to strengthen us by His Spirit to make us love like Jesus. Ask Him to help you go low and stay low, ask Him to give you the same love that led Him to die for His enemies, and ask Him to teach you how to be merciless towards the enemy.
“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.”
Ephesians 6:12